A feature from Google Labs gives you real-time suggestions for search queries as you type them. Some of the results are hilarious.
The suggestions are influenced by the number of previous searches using those words and the searches it turns up can be funny, touching, puzzling and scary.
1. What would a...
Never mind what the chair would look like, how would you know which direction you were going in?
2. Do g...
You need to get out of your bedroom, dweeb, and go find out for yourself.
3. Does Gordon...
Does he ever? Several million UK taxpayers will confirm this.
4. How much wo...
The answer, apparently, is 357 butt cords of wood a day.
5. How wron...
Google thinks we were wrong but God disagrees. So Google overruled Him.
6. I am e...
Is it the sheer number of them that does it for you? Or is it all that monosodium glutomate?
7. I like to ta...
You really don't need to do that. Blockbuster still stocks Jurassic Park, we're told.
8. I need a...
Me, too. Where can I buy one?
9. I want to ki...
Yep - homicide, patricide, fratricide, matricide. All perfectly reasonable search terms.
10. Is a...
Is a banana a herb? Public schoolboys everywhere will tell you that it can be if you dry the skin, roll it in a cigarette paper and set fire to it.
11. Is it impossible to...
It is absolutely impossible to lick your elbow. But drinking a gallon of milk in an hour?
12. My poop...
How frequently does it change colour? Should I be examining mine, too?
13. I like to play with...
Not the other kids, or your toys? You'll go blind, you know?
14. Where is chu...
Chuck Norris, the stereotype of the 1980s action film muscle man, has been a little quiet lately. perhaps he's lying low after seeing this Google Suggest suggestion.
15. Who took my...
Perhaps you shouldn't have been so careless with it.
16. Why is my g...
Goldfish generally turn black when you put copper sulphate in the aquarium. Next...
17. Why is my sn...
May be your snake isn't eating because you're only offering him orange snot. It might account for the floating snail, too.
18. Why is there a...
How long has he been there? The quote - from an episode of Lost - was once voted the best quote of all time.
19. Can I have a go on...
No, but it's open season on my wholemeal rolls.
20. I feel like a...
We sympathise - it's that Monday morning feeling down on the farm. This classic phrase is from the cult movie Withnail and I.
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